Cabin Fever
by emospritelet
Summary: Part 3 of the Honeymoon series of Rumbelle one-shots. Before leaving for a few days together at the cabin, Belle ponders what it might have been like if they had managed to consummate their love in the Enchanted Forest, so Rumple decides to use a little magic to find out. Meanwhile, the Charmings go for a walk in the woods and come across the cabin where they first kissed...


**Thanks to Emilie Brown for the cover art.**

**To the two Guests that left reviews on Something Blue requesting a cabin scene – your wish is my command! **

**To Guest who wanted a one-shot per week until the new season starts – by all means send me a prompt or two, and I'll do my best!**

**Erik'sTrueAngel prompt: 'Snow and Charming ****are busy with the new prince, but what if they let Emma and Henry babysit while they go and enjoy some peace with each other. And let's say they happen to stumble upon the cabin where they first kissed when they were cursed and let's say Rumple and Belle are already in the middle of "something".'**

**Well, I couldn't resist…**

* * *

"How many days do I pack for?" asked Belle, folding a dress and smoothing it before placing it in the small bag they were taking. Rumple threw a look over his shoulder as he pulled some of his own things from a drawer.

"I was thinking three days," he said, his eyes suddenly wicked. "At least to start with."

Belle blushed a little, picking out items of underwear.

"I'm not sure I'll survive, if we carry on as we have been," she admitted, her blush rising, and he turned to her with a look of concern on his face.

"Are you well?" he asked gently, and she bit her lip hesitantly.

"I…" she faltered. "I'm a little…sore, actually." Her cheeks _burned_.

He looked upset, his brown eyes anxious, and she almost wished that she hadn't said anything.

"Why didn't you tell me?" he asked, and she couldn't hide her grin.

"Because I was enjoying myself too much," she said, and his anxiety seemed to fade a little as he grinned back.

"Nevertheless, I have no intention of hurting you," he said firmly. "I'll just have to keep my hands off you, that's all."

"Gods, no!" protested Belle, shoving the bundle of underwear into the bag. "I just thought – could you – heal me?" She looked shy, but relaxed a little at his gentle smile.

"Of course." He approached her slowly, putting his hands on her waist and pulling her gently back against him. His hands slid down, over her hips to lie flat on her lower belly. Belle caught her breath as she felt a tingle run through her, vibrating through her pelvis, and a rush of heat that followed.

"All better," he breathed, his mouth by her ear. She felt her breath quicken, her heart beginning its tell-tale thump, and pulled away from him before she could get distracted from the packing.

"Good," she said, a little breathlessly. There was a moment's silence, as they continued to fold items of clothing. Belle began picking up the toiletries she wanted; moisturiser, cotton pads, make-up remover.

"Was I…too rough?" he asked uncertainly, and she turned to him with a smile, putting her hands on his shoulders.

"_We _were just too insatiable," she corrected him. "I loved every minute of it, or couldn't you tell?"

She leaned in to kiss him, and he responded, pulling her close and slipping his tongue into her mouth to taste her. She pressed herself against him, kissing him hard before pulling away again and settling back on her heels with a sigh of contentment.

"I want you to tell me if there's something you want from me," he said quietly. "I particularly want you to tell me if there's anything I do that you don't like."

"Well, I haven't found anything yet," she said mischievously, blue eyes sparkling. "I guess we'll just have to keep trying new things. What was that you said about a book?" Her eyes were wide, curious, and he laughed out loud.

"I'll get one, sweetheart," he promised, kissing her forehead. "But I can think of plenty more things I'd like to do to you before we need to resort to outside inspiration."

"Hmm." Belle shot him a fond look, and moved out of the warm circle of his arms to finish her packing. Her nightdresses. A brush. "When did you first realise that you wanted me that way? I know you didn't expect to, when you made the deal for me."

He looked thoughtful for a moment. "No, I didn't expect to," he admitted. "I admired your beauty and your strength, but I never thought I'd come to care for you. You hadn't long been in the Dark Castle when I knew I was in serious trouble." He smiled wistfully. "There was the time that you fell from the curtains into my arms, of course. That's when I knew I had feelings for you."

"Me, too," she agreed, and he smiled.

"Of course, the time when I realised what those feelings were came a little later," he said. "I believe it was when you fell asleep by the fire in the great hall, and I carried you to bed. I think it was then."

"Hmm, I remember that," she said vaguely. "I wondered why you didn't just send me to my room with magic. I was happy you hadn't, though." She gave him a cheeky grin. "I think that's when I knew, too. I started admiring you in those leather pants from that moment on."

He chuckled at that. "Indeed? You were very discreet."

"Far more discreet than _you_," she sniffed, shooting him an amused look. "You were constantly looking down my blouse."

He put a hand to his heart with a wounded expression. "In my defence, your necklines seemed to get lower the longer you were there. Barring the gold dress, of course, which was clearly made to attract men's eyes."

"And who made my clothes, once I was at your castle?" she demanded, with a grin. He shrugged, enjoying the banter, and they lapsed into silence once more.

Belle chewed her lip, looking pensive. "Do you ever wonder what it might have been like, if we'd not – parted?"

He gave a snort of amusement. "Believe me, dear, I thought about it constantly after you'd gone."

"As did I," she said sadly. "I would have liked it, just once. To be with you as you were then."

He looked up at her, his gaze calculating. "Really? Despite the – differences?" He passed his hand up and down his body, and she chuckled.

"Don't get me wrong, I love you as you are here," she confirmed. "But it was you in the other form that I first fell in love with. I can't separate that from who you are. I know that you thought yourself ugly, but to me you were beautiful. The gold on your skin – the way it shone in the candlelight. I just wanted to lick it."

He looked startled, and she chuckled again, zipping up her bag.

"Are you ready?" she asked, and he gulped slightly, nodding.

"Let's be on our way," he said.

* * *

Mary Margaret finished changing Neal and picked the little prince up, placing him over her shoulder and rocking him gently as he gurgled happily.

"He's stopped crying," remarked Emma, pouring herself a coffee and gesturing with her cup. "I was beginning to wonder if that would ever happen."

Mary Margaret shot her a look. "It must be unsettling for him," she said. "First day in the world and he gets kidnapped by an evil witch. Post-partum trauma appears to run in our family."

Emma chuckled at that, sliding into the chair next to Henry and ruffling his hair. "Look, I'm just kidding. If you guys need a babysitter, you got one right here."

"Two," put in Henry, grinning up at his grandmother. Mary Margaret smiled warmly.

"Actually, I was thinking of going for a walk with David," she admitted. "We've spent so little time on our own lately, it would be nice to have an hour or two to ourselves."

"Sure," said Emma. "Leave Neal with us. He has plenty of milk, right?"

"All in the fridge," confirmed Mary Margaret, as her husband approached. "You sure you don't mind?"

"No problem," Emma assured her. "After everything that's happened the last few days, babysitting seems like a breeze."

"Thanks, Emma," said David, bending to kiss the top of her head. "We'll be back for dinner. Order out, if you like."

"Cool!" said Henry eagerly. "Can we get pizza?"

"Whatever you want," smiled Mary Margaret.

* * *

Belle looked eagerly out of the window as Rumple steered the Cadillac towards the cabin.

"Can we walk by the lake first?" she asked, turning to him. "I never knew it was so beautiful around here!"

He smiled, and turned off the main path to take the dirt track of red earth and pine needles that ran around the lake. The scrunching of gravel gave way to a soft, heavy sound as the car swung out of sight of the cabin and around to the far side of the lake. Trees led right up to the waterside, shielding it from view, and Rumple pulled the car to a stop and parked up. Belle was beaming, almost jumping up and down in her seat with excitement, and he couldn't help grinning at her as he opened her door and pulled her up to kiss him.

They took a slow walk around the lake, a quick spell ensuring that any biting insects were repelled from them, and Rumple enjoyed the feeling of Belle's hand in his, the fresh scent of clean earth and pine resin sharp in their nostrils.

"It's so lovely here," said Belle happily, tossing her curls out of her face. "Different to the forests at home, but just as beautiful."

"The trees are very different to your homeland," he remarked, and she turned to him with a smile.

"Similar to the Dark Forest, though," she said. "The trees here are a little smaller, and there are fewer species. It is lovely, isn't it?"

"The company makes it far more agreeable than it would otherwise be," he said, with a small, lopsided grin, and she smiled fondly, tucking her arm through his as they walked.

Having completed a circuit of the lake, they retrieved their belongings from the car, Rumple carrying his bag and a large basket of provisions, and Belle with her own bag. The cabin was dark and fairly cold, so he decided to light a fire while Belle put the food in the tiny kitchenette and stowed the champagne in the refrigerator.

"Should I cast the cloaking spell?" he asked, as the first flames started to lick over the logs in the fireplace. Belle shook her head.

"We're far enough out of Storybrooke for us not to be disturbed," she said. "Save your magic for something worthwhile."

He grinned at that; he had already thought about what he wanted to use it for.

"I'll put our clothes away," she announced, straightening up and dusting off her hands, and he smiled: that tiny, secretive smile that she didn't entirely trust.

"I shall await your presence, dearest," he said, twitching his eyebrows, and she frowned slightly, wondering what he was up to. She walked towards the bedroom, and Rumple grinned to himself, gathering his magic for a complex spell that they would hopefully both enjoy.

* * *

Belle carried their bags through to the small bedroom, and gasped as she opened the door. There, lying on the bed, looking as clean and fresh as it had the day he had given it to her, was the blue dress that had been her favourite in the Dark Castle. A small pile of white cloth folded neatly atop it turned out to be stockings and undergarments. Her tiny, heeled shoes rested at the side of the bed. A smile spread across her face as she picked up the dress, holding it against her body. Well, he had clearly been paying attention when she had been speaking of their time together in the Enchanted Forest. Heat burned briefly through her as she considered whether he would be changing his own clothes for something more – traditional.

Throwing the bags onto the bed, she hurriedly pulled off her coat and shrugged out of the dress she was wearing. He had left her traditional Enchanted Forest underthings; a petticoat and chemise, along with the stockings and garters, and she felt a certain amount of nostalgia as she put them on. The rational, practical part of her brain reminded her that panties, bras and tights were far easier to manage. Turning to view herself in the full-length mirror, she had to admire the simplicity of the white silk and linen, and the lace garters with their tiny silk flowers were very pretty. She turned to the dress, stepping into the skirt and lacing it at the waist, before pulling on the bodice and fastening it with the black cord, lacing it through the eyelets and pulling tight, so that her breasts were pushed up with the thin linen chemise.

Belle eyed herself critically, turning this way and that. She had put on a little weight since escaping the asylum, which she felt was a good thing, and she filled out the dress nicely. She smirked as she imagined Rumple's face when he saw her in it. Slipping on the shoes, she hurriedly brushed through her hair, before piling it on top of her head in a loose bun, tendrils snaking down to brush her cheeks and the nape of her neck. Her blue eyes flashed knowingly in the mirror, the eyes of a married woman, now acquainted with the touch of her husband and anticipating further delights. She was ready.

Taking a deep breath, and smoothing her skirts, Belle lifted her head and strode through to the main room of the cabin. Her mouth fell open as she entered, and she clapped a hand to it in astonishment. The cabin's small and cosy room had disappeared, and the great hall of the Dark Castle stretched before her, bathed in the warm light of numerous candelabras and the flickering light of the massive marble fireplace. The squeak of a spinning wheel pierced through Belle's consciousness, and her eyes swept the room to see Rumple standing at his large wheel, hands moving restlessly over the smooth wood as gold thread spooled into a basket at his feet. Her eyes roved over him hungrily. His hair was curled, threads of gold and silver shining in the candlelight, the glow from the fire gleaming on his gold-flecked skin. He was clad in one of her favourite outfits: tight-fitting black leather pants in knee-high boots, a black brocade waistcoat over a dark red silk shirt clinging to his slender form. She licked her lips, want stirring in her loins and causing a pleasant tightness in her belly. How could he not think he was attractive like this? Oh, sometimes magic was _wonderful_!

"Rumplestiltskin?" she said throatily, and his hands stayed, the wheel halting in its rhythmic spinning. He turned, looking over his shoulder at her, and his mouth curved upwards slightly, his eyes glinting at her.

"Well, well, dearie," he breathed, and her stomach flipped as his voice washed over her, the familiar lilt, the lower cadence he used when he was being serious that had always made her bite her lip and flush. She chanced a quick look over her shoulder, and saw that the door to the bedroom had disappeared, the familiar double doors to the great hall were now at her back. She gasped, and heard his high-pitched giggle, making the hairs rise at the back of her neck. Biting her lip, and wondering how far his magic had gone in creating this little fantasy, she rushed towards the doors, crying out in surprise as she was spun around and thrust back towards him by an invisible force.

"I'm afraid you're unable to leave here, dearie," he purred, steepling his fingers and looking extremely pleased with himself. "The spell means that, once someone enters this room, they cannot leave. Any attempt to flee will only pull you back to me." He was grinning at her, his eyes gleaming as his fingers danced in the air. "I'll never let you go, my sweet," he said softly. "Not now I have you here. You promised me forever, or have you forgotten?"

"No," she breathed, her chest heaving, her eyes wide. She couldn't tear her gaze from him, her eyes running over his slender frame, enjoying the way the leather hugged his thighs and stretched across his groin. She could see the top of his smooth chest where the red silk shirt was open almost to his sternum, flecks of gold on his skin making her wet her lips with anticipation. She raised her eyes to his, her mouth opening as she saw his pupils dilate, his too-large eyes darkening with lust, and she felt the now-familiar tug in her belly as her breath hitched in her throat. She swallowed hard.

"I meant what I said," she said, more loudly. "Forever."

"Excellent," he whispered, drawing nearer, his hands reaching for her. Belle pulled away instinctively, wanting to preserve the moment, to draw it out. She darted for the full-length mirror that had always been covered with a shawl in the Dark Castle. Here, it was exposed, her reflection appearing as she stepped in front of it. She took in her flushed cheeks, her bright eyes, the way her bosom heaved as she tried to catch her breath. He approached slowly, his movements sinuous and deadly, his hands reaching for her waist and making her bite back a moan as he pressed himself against her. She leant back against the slim hardness of his body, his fingers digging into her soft flesh as his lips grazed her ear, making her shiver. If only they had been able to share this, in the Dark Castle! She made up her mind to enjoy the moment for as long as his spell lasted.

"How beautiful you look, my Belle," he said softly, his voice rumbling through her and making her tremble. He pressed his lips to her throat, and she moaned, feeling him smile against her.

"So delicious," he murmured, and his fingers left her waist, inching up her body to pull her hair loose, letting her curls tumble around her shoulders. He inhaled deeply, breathing in her scent and brushing his lips up her neck to her ear, nibbling gently on her lobe and making her gasp.

"Why did you come to me?" he asked, his voice a hoarse whisper, and she swallowed.

"I wanted adventure," she said softly, and whimpered as he nuzzled her neck.

"So you agreed to give yourself to a monster?" he breathed, and his tongue darted out to lick her throat. She bit back a moan, watching him in the mirror.

"I didn't think that was what I was doing," she said, straining to form a sentence.

"And yet you did." He sank his teeth into her gently, making her squirm and moan.

"We can use the mirrors here?" she whispered questioningly. "No chance of the Queen seeing us this time?"

She felt him smile against her skin, his fingers sliding up her, thumbs brushing the undersides of her breasts.

"If she happens to be looking, we'll give her a proper show," he breathed, and she shuddered with pleasure as he gently sucked on the pale skin of her throat.

"I'm so glad you did this," she said softly. "I wanted you, so much. Like this."

"And if the monster wishes to do – unspeakable things – to you?" he whispered, and she shivered, desire coiling within her as his breath tickled her ear.

"I think I can handle that kind of adventure," she said boldly. "I would suggest that he does his worst."

He groaned in her ear, his breath hot against her neck, and she gasped as his hands tightened on her.

"You really shouldn't tempt me so, dearie," he breathed, and the tugging in her belly became an ache. His fingers swept up her body, sliding beneath the thin linen of her chemise to the right of her neck and pushing it aside, baring the length of her pale shoulder. He lowered his mouth to taste her, and she gasped, lifting a hand to delve into his soft hair. His lips trailed fire along her shoulder to her neck, before nibbling their way back up to her ear. Belle let out a tiny cry of pleasure, and he chuckled darkly, one arm snaking around her waist and holding her tight against him.

"I have you now, my beauty," he breathed, and she gazed at his reflection in the mirror.

"What are you going to do to me?" she asked breathlessly, her chest heaving.

He sucked his breath in over his teeth, shaking his head sadly. "I fear your ordeal will be – relentless." He drew out the last word in a long hiss, and her lips curved into a smile.

"Do you promise?" she asked coyly, and he growled and bit down into her shoulder once more. Belle cried out, writhing against him, and he turned her to face him, their foreheads pressed together, noses almost touching, his breath warm on her face.

"Kiss me, Rumplestiltskin," she whispered, and he shuddered with need, his hands rising to gently cup her face. Belle moaned as his fingers slid into her hair and he pressed his lips to hers, her body sinking into his as he deepened the kiss. His tongue pushed into her mouth, probing gently, and she let her own tongue explore him, her hands sliding up his body to grip his shoulders. He held her for a moment, tasting her, and his hands slid down her arms to pull her close against him, before inching up her body to the laces that fastened the bodice of her dress.

Belle's breath quickened as he began to pull slowly at the black cord, gently undoing it and using a long finger to pluck the laces from their eyelets, until the bodice was open and she was exposed to him in nothing but the sheer linen of the chemise, her dusky pink nipples showing through the thin fabric. He let out a low, rumbling gasp, pushing the bodice from her shoulders and letting it fall to the floor before cupping her with his hands, thumbs stroking gently over the nipples and making them harden. She let her head roll back with a tiny noise of pleasure as he caressed her, his lips ghosting across the top of her chest and down over her breast. She gasped as his tongue touched her through the cloth, his wet mouth closing over her, the gauzy fabric scraping delightfully over the sensitive nipple. His tongue traced a circle around it, and she bit back a moan, her fingers sinking into his hair.

Rumple straightened up slowly, his breath warm on her face as he gently touched his nose against hers in an affectionate gesture. His hands dropped to her waist and began unfastening the laces of her skirt, tugging at the strings and causing a delicious friction against her skin as he opened it up. He let the blue linen pool at her feet, followed by her petticoat, stroking his hands over her hips as he growled in appreciation at the sight of her. Belle stood resplendent, her thin chemise hiding nothing, her pale skin showing through, along with the darkened buds of her nipples and the deep pink cleft between her thighs. She followed the Storybrooke custom of young women, and he mentally thanked Ruby for introducing her to waxing, as her most secret place was hairless, smooth, and, as he knew, softer than the finest silk. Her stockings were a shade paler than her skin, the silk flowers of her garters a delightful contrast, and he was filled with the desire to peel every last stitch from her and take her right there on the rug in front of the fire. Just as he had wanted to back in the Dark Castle, when he was convinced he would have been met with screaming and pleading had he ever attempted such a move.

Belle was breathing heavily, and his grip tightened on her hips as he backed her towards the long oak table, where they had taken tea so many times.

"I thought about this," she said dreamily, wrapping her arms around his neck as he slid his hands to the back of her thighs and lifted her, pushing her back onto the table top.

"Oh?" he asked, intrigued, his lips pulling at the skin of her neck. "Like this?" He slid his hands up her thighs, over her stocking tops, stroking against her pale, silky skin.

"Exactly like this," she breathed, and he grinned into her neck, sucking at her flesh, his hands creeping up her inner thighs to reach her core. Belle gasped as he touched her through the thin linen, and wiggled her hips on the cool wood. She plucked at the buttons of his waistcoat, and he grinned at her.

"Eager, are we, dearie?" he said silkily, and she pouted, making him harden further. He carefully undid the buttons and shrugged off the waistcoat, chuckling as she reached for the opening in his shirt and slid her hands inside. She explored him with a look of wonder on her face, and he wished for the thousandth time that he had not rejected her, that he had believed in her love for him. He was happy for her to caress him; he had healed all the wounds the witch had left on his body over his year in captivity. The only scars left now were internal. He pushed the thoughts of the lost year aside roughly as Belle unfastened his shirt, her blue eyes wide with delight as the candlelight played over his gold-flecked skin.

"So pretty," she said softly, and he snorted incredulously.

"You are the strangest girl," he said fondly, and bent to kiss her again, letting her push the red silk from his shoulders and down his arms. He went to work on the stockings while she was distracted, untying the garters and peeling the thin silk from her thighs, running his hands over her smooth skin. Belle finally got the shirt off him and dropped her hands to the fastenings of his pants, but he pushed himself in between her legs before she could untie them, making her gasp as he pressed up against her. He took her face in his hands, bending to kiss her with a fiery passion, and Belle groaned into his mouth, clinging to him as his tongue probed her. One of his hands slid down, beneath the chemise and between her legs, and it was his turn to groan as he felt how wet she was. She bit back a cry as he stroked her, his fingers sliding against her smooth folds.

"Yes!" she gasped. "That's so good!"

He grinned into her mouth, pulling away to lick along her jawline, and his free hand grasped her hip, tugging her against him as his finger slipped inside her.

"Please!" she whispered, and he let out a dark chuckle.

"Please what, my sweet?"

She drew a deep breath, looking up at him with wide blue eyes darkened with desire.

"Please, take me, Rumplestiltskin."

All of the darkest dreams he had enjoyed about her had contained that line at some point, and he was lost. He was revelling in the knowledge that this wasn't a dream, that he wouldn't be waking with the kind of raging, unfulfilled desire that had made it very difficult to be around his little maid while wearing tight leather. He peeled off her chemise in one swift movement, leaving her naked before him, her chest heaving and her skin glowing warmly in the candlelight. Bending to kiss her again, he gathered her legs around him and picked her up, encouraging her to throw her arms around his neck. He carried her over to the fire, laying her down on the thick rug, and began to kiss her all over, loving the way she moaned and writhed beneath him.

"So beautiful, my little Belle," he crooned, his tongue sliding over her breast and circling her nipple. She arched her body into him, her fingers digging into his shoulders. "You are so beautiful."

He slipped his finger inside her once more, his thumb rubbing her clit in languid circles as he pressed further into her, and she moaned loudly, grabbing his hair and pulling his head down for a clumsy kiss. She was writhing against him, pressing herself into his hand, and he could feel the tension begin to build throughout her body,

"Rumple…" she whimpered, and he smiled, licking up her neck to tug at her earlobe with his teeth. Her breath was coming in pants, her face flushing prettily, and he quickened his pace as she arched up with a cry, pumping her hips against his hand as she came. He stroked her through it, chuckling at the heavy-eyed look of bliss on her face as her cries softened and slowed.

"That was incredible," she slurred, falling back into the thick rug and breathing hard.

"And now," he said, sliding his hands up her thighs, with more than a hint of the dark imp in his voice. "Now I get to take you, my beauty."

Belle looked up at him, her eyes burning with lust. "Yes," she breathed, reaching for him.

* * *

"It's so nice to have some time alone," said Mary Margaret happily, as she and David strode along a pine-needle strewn trail through the woods. It had begun to rain, a fine drizzle that left a sheen of water on their faces and dampened their hair, and she was hoping that the rain wouldn't grow too heavy and force them to head back to the truck.

"I think alone-time may be more difficult to get once Emma moves out," said David, threading his fingers through hers and swinging their arms as they walked. "Did she say she'd seen any places?"

Mary Margaret shook her head. "No, but I know Henry's been looking. I understand; there's not enough room for all of us there now Neal's around. I'll miss her, though."

"We'll all miss her," confirmed David, squeezing her hand. "But we'll see her every day. If she's happy to babysit like this, you and I can actually spend a little time together, barring emergencies."

Mary Margaret sighed, brushing her short black hair off her face, and wiping the rainwater from her hand.

"Do you ever think things will be normal in Storybrooke?" she asked. "Just – _normal_? No curses, no magic spells going wrong, no portals sucking people back to the Enchanted Forest?"

David pulled a face. "Probably not," he admitted. "Magic's here now. Unless Regina and Rumple can find a way to get rid of it, I think our lives are going to go on in their usual crazy manner."

She leant her head against his shoulder affectionately. "Well, if we can bear and raise a child amidst all the madness, things can't be too bad, right?"

He shot her a fond look. "Already thinking about the next?"

She chuckled, swatting him, and they picked up the pace a little. The path curved around an ancient tree, and Mary Margaret frowned as she saw something appearing through the drizzle.

"Look, it's the cabin!" she exclaimed, and David nodded.

"Our first kiss," he said, with a grin. "Well, our first _cursed_ kiss, anyway."

The rain was beginning to fall harder, and Mary Margaret pulled a face.

"Let's go and get some shelter," she suggested. "It's Gold's cabin, right? He won't mind."

"As long as he's not there himself," said David warily, running a hand through his wet hair. "No way I want to be interrupting the guy's honeymoon."

The rainfall changed from a shower to a torrent, and they made it the rest of the way to the cabin at a run.

"His car's not here," gasped Mary Margaret, as she jumped onto the porch. "I think we're safe. Let's get inside and get warm."

Impulsively, he pulled her into a kiss, and she fell against him, enjoying the feel of their wet skin, tasting the rain on his lips as he kissed her.

"I feel as though I haven't seen you in days," he murmured, and she giggled, kissing him again.

"Let's continue this inside, out of the rain," she suggested, and pushed open the door to the cabin. It didn't occur to her to wonder why it wasn't locked.

* * *

Mary Margaret and David stumbled into the cabin, kissing one another, and pulled apart in shock as the dim interior disappeared, to reveal a huge room with ornate tapestries decorating the walls, plinths displaying strange artefacts dotted around, a large spinning wheel opposite the crackling fire, and a thick, patterned rug on which Rumplestiltskin and Belle were naked and locked in a passionate clinch, her legs wrapped around his waist and her nails scoring his back as he drove into her. Mary Margaret felt her jaw drop, her hand squeezing David's so tightly that he winced. Rumple had – somehow – recreated a room in the Dark Castle, and his pre-Storybrooke self to boot. A detached part of her mind watched with a sort of bizarre fascination as the candlelight played over the gold flecks on his skin, which (and she _really _hadn't wanted to know this) were all over his body. His lean limbs were dark against Belle's ivory flesh, his curling hair brushing her face as they kissed, as they devoured one another. The noises coming from Belle made Mary Margaret's face burn.

"Oh. My. _God!_" she breathed, and David tugged at her hand.

"Quick, let's go!" he whispered, and she nodded fervently, turning on her heel to flee the cabin. The moment they turned back, however, an unseen force whipped them around and threw them further towards the fire. Further towards the couple on the rug.

"Rumple!" gasped Belle. "Oh, yes! That's so good! I'm so – so close, love!" She arched her back with a cry, her nails raking deep furrows into his greenish-grey skin as her hips bucked, and Mary Margaret clapped a hand to her mouth in horror.

"Oh, I _so _did not want to hear that!" she hissed, and David chuckled nervously.

"Come on, there has to be a way out!" he said softly, and tried pulling her with him again. Their increased efforts only threw them nearer to Mr and Mrs Gold, who were luckily too involved in one another to notice. Belle's cries had quieted, and Rumple had lowered his head to her left breast, sucking her nipple into his mouth with a throaty sound of enjoyment. Mary Margaret's eyes bulged as she took in the scene once more, powerless to look away.

"Oh, my God, this is like a _car crash!'_ she whispered, and David swallowed hard beside her, his unwilling eyes following the thrusting of Rumple's hips. Belle's moans were growing louder once more, and David felt his face burning with discomfort at witnessing this highly private encounter.

"Do you think Rumple could temporarily remove my eyeballs?" whispered Mary Margaret, and David gave her an incredulous look.

"You seriously want to ask him that? _Now_?"

"If I don't I'm worried that I'll have to bleach them!" she hissed fiercely, and he held up placating hands.

"Okay, okay! Look, it's obviously a spell preventing us from leaving. How about we just turn around, really carefully, and don't walk any closer to the door?"

Pursing her lips, Mary Margaret nodded, and they turned slowly, so that their backs were to the couple by the fire. Nothing happened to spin them back around, and David heaved a sigh of relief.

"Okay, that's better," he sighed, and his wife shot him a slanting look.

"Seriously?" she breathed. "I can't _see_ them, but I can sure as hell _hear _them!"

The Charmings stuck their fingers in their ears in a vain attempt to block out the sounds of pleasure coming from the rug by the fireplace.

"Of all the ways I thought our afternoon together could go, listening to Rumplestiltskin having sex was the farthest from my mind," she hissed.

"I just hope he finishes before he turns around," whispered David, and Mary Margaret gave him an incredulous look.

"You _want _to hear that?" she said disbelievingly. "I already feel as though my ears are bleeding!"

"I really don't want to be the guy who's famous for being killed because he interrupted the Dark One pleasuring his wife," he whispered hotly. "I figure, if he gets his rocks off, he's less likely to turn us into bugs."

Mary Margaret frowned. "Okay, valid point. So what's our plan?"

"This is a spell," he said softly. "So, maybe it'll end when they're done, and we can sneak out, and no one needs to know."

"_Ever_," she agreed fervently. "No one but you, me, and Archie when I see him for PTSD treatment!"

"Maybe Rumple can make us a forgetting potion," he said hopefully, and her face brightened a little.

"Oh, my Belle," Rumple crooned from the rug. "I can feel you, my sweet. I can feel you getting ready to come again. Are you coming, my love?"

"Yes!" moaned Belle, sounding as though she was close to tears.

"_Fuck!_" he groaned.

"Oh, God, kill me!" whimpered Mary Margaret, and David chuckled, squeezing her hand.

The cries grew louder, reaching their peak, with Belle shrieking wordlessly and Rumple letting out a muffled shout and swearing loudly as he followed her. The Charmings stayed very still as they listened to the cries fade into pants while the newlyweds tried to catch their breath. There was the sound of heavy, wet kisses and contented murmuring, along with whispered endearments that made Mary Margaret think they were actually pretty cute together. Nakedness aside.

"Any moment, surely," breathed David. "Stay exactly where you are, and maybe…"

"You have _got_ to be fucking _kidding_ me!" Rumple's loud, snide voice made them tense and groan inwardly. David chanced a look at Mary Margaret; she was raising her eyes to the ceiling and muttering soundlessly, almost as if she was praying.

"Oh, Char-mings…" Rumple almost sang in his usual high, lilting tone, and Mary Margaret gulped as she took David's hand.

"_Do _turn around," he continued pleasantly. "I'm sure there's an _excellent _explanation for the pair of you embracing voyeurism."

They turned slowly, Mary Margaret's eyes on the floor, but she raised them once they were facing the Dark One and his wife. Rumplestiltskin was poised above Belle's slim, pale body, her legs still wrapped around his waist, the thin ropes of muscle in his arms and chest jumping slightly. His otherworldly skin gleamed in the light from the candles, and his eyes glinted at them malevolently. Belle was blushing furiously, a look of utter mortification on her face.

"I'm _waiting_," he demanded, and Mary Margaret held up her hands with a beseeching expression.

"We're _so _sorry, Mr – Rum – I mean, we just wanted to get out of the rain, and we couldn't see your car, and…" She broke off helplessly.

"We tried to leave," added David, clearly trying to look everywhere but at the couple in front of him. "But we couldn't. Whatever kind of spell this is, it wouldn't let us."

Rumplestiltskin eyed them coldly for a moment.

"So, there's no desperate emergency," he surmised. "No one is dead or dying, no zombie apocalypse, the walls between dimensions haven't suddenly broken down and ushered in a new age of terror and bloodshed?"

"No…we just – came out for a walk," offered Mary Margaret, lamely. His lips curled in a dark smile.

"Then please feel free to leave and never return," he said nastily. "And if you could mention to the other inhabitants of this miserable town that I would greatly appreciate not being disturbed on my honeymoon, I would be exceedingly grateful." He waved his hand towards them and the Charmings turned to find the cabin door behind them.

"Th–thank you!" stammered Mary Margaret. "And – congratulations, by the way!"

Rumplestiltskin grunted something unintelligible, and probably uncomplimentary, and the Charmings strode to the door and disappeared outside. Instantly, within the bubble of the spell, the Great Hall was back to its usual state, the Dark One looking down at his true love, spread out on the rug beneath him.

"So," he said wearily. "That cloaking spell?"

Belle giggled, still blushing. "I think that's an _excellent_ idea."

* * *

**A/N: ah, the Charmings bustling in where they're not wanted – again.**

**Please keep the prompts coming (Twyla, I haven't forgotten yours)**


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